Showing posts with label seniors. Show all posts
Showing posts with label seniors. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 16, 2016

Love with the passing of time





Recently I met a wonderful community of writers. Those who write about their true experiences with their aging parents, and dealing with Alzheimer's and dementia. A wonderful support group, and people who know how difficult it is as my family is going through it right now.

What follows is the post written for the community about the inspiration behind my fictional novel of love in the golden years.

Love in the senior years: A true inspiration to me. My parents are married over sixty years as of this writing. Sixty years of ups and downs, good health and bad, happiness and sadness. But one thing remains: a steadfast love. It is this love that inspired me to write; theirs, and another couple: my husband’s elderly aunt and uncle.

You see, when I was a little girl, my mother suffered from mental illness. There were times in her delusion when she barely knew who she was, much like Alzheimer’s. It wasn’t easy and she was hospitalized many times. That is why her recent diagnosis of dementia has been very difficult to take. But as I saw when I was a child, my father puts all of my mother’s needs first. At complete disregard for his own comfort, he would do anything for Mom. He’s remained by her side, loyal, loving, respectful, treating her as if she’s the young beauty he first married so long ago.

I saw another great love. Louise, my husband’s aunt, had a stroke several years back and was hospitalized and eventually moved into a nursing home. Her husband, Hubert, took the time every single day driving to see her, helping her to eat, talking with her even though she couldn’t speak well, and making sure every need of hers was met. There came a time he couldn’t drive any longer, and he would wait as the senior bus picked him up, not missing one day with his wife. When he suffered his own health crisis, he ended up in the same care facility. Though they weren’t in the same room, Uncle Hubert would wheel himself down the hall to spend time with his beloved each and every day.
Hubert and Louise didn’t have many family members, so I became a regular visitor of theirs. I watched as love appeared to grow even stronger as Hubert sat by his wife’s side, gazing upon her as if she was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen, and talking to her as if she was the only person in the world who mattered.

It was then that a story began forming in my mind. What if an older couple actually met for the first time in an assisted living center? What if a warm friendship was forged, and eventually led to love? My book Love Woven in Time was born.

It chronicles the lives of Harry and Rose, two people who meet in the golden years, both with their own sets of challenges, but the main one being Harry’s onset of dementia. It was carefully written with the help of a dementia coach and author, Carol Howell, and with thoughts of my parents and my husband’s uncle and aunt, giving a story that is tender, believable, and written from the heart.

Though Hubert and Louise have passed, I am blessed to still have my parents. I continue to watch, grow, and learn from them about true love. A bond that cannot be broken. Even with the ravages of time, age, and memory loss.
https://alzauthors.wordpress.com/2016/08/16/meet-karen-malena-author-of-love-woven-in-time/



Thursday, March 14, 2013

Sharing





I believe we are on this earth to love and uplift one another. I think it pleases God, makes Him smile when we do a kindness for someone. It isn't easy as we go about our daily lives to feel this sort of "love" especially with the sandpaper people we encounter daily.

When was the last time you really took the time to put aside the cell phone and listen to that person who's talking to you? When was the last time you made that phone call to a loved one who might be lonely? I, too, am so very guilty of this. I can be typing away at my computer, lost in a story I'm writing, and my husband is asking my opinion of something. I haven't heard a word he said. I must close the cover of my laptop, look him straight in the eyes, and really listen to what he's saying.

As for calling or visiting a lonely loved one, the other day while sitting in the nursing home with my husband's Uncle Hubert, thinking of all the other things I should or could be doing, the dear elderly man looked at me and said, "Thank you so much for coming today. I really miss you guys." Wow, lump in throat, and convicted! What did it take, only an hour out of my precious schedule to give this man a little happiness?

Having said that, it is with great pleasure I share another author's work with you on this page. For I think in loving others, we must build them up, help promote them. I believe this makes our Heavenly Father smile. Take a moment, or two or thirty, and think about someone you can help today. A phone call, a post on Facebook, a little card sent in the mail. And when you encounter people, close your laptop, turn off your cell phone and really listen to them. You'll make their day and perhaps, in the process, your own day will become one of the happiest in a long while for you.




http://www.amazon.com/Lets-Talk-Dementia-Caregivers-ebook/dp/B00CTAW7MS/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1376265397&sr=1-1&keywords=carol+howell



Carol Howell is a Certified Dementia Specialist and Endorsed Life Coach with an emphasis on Music Therapy. After her husband's brain injury in 1992 and her mother's diagnosis of Alzheimer's in 2006, Carol felt the need to learn about the brain. As her knowledge increased, she became more intrigued and determined to become an equipped and prepared caregiver. Her company, Senior Life Journeys, was born from this desire to learn and help others.
Carol is the author of IF MY BODY IS A TEMPLE, WHY AM I EATING DOUGHNUTS? It tells of the "amazing miracle" that helped her lose 100 pounds. The book is written with the humor and sincerity Carol is known to display in her own life.
Carol also authored LET'S TALK DEMENTIA - A Caregiver's Guide. This easy to read book is full of helpful tips for caregiving, information about dementia, and 23 SMILES that will brighten your day.
Carol resides in South Carolina with her husband, Michael, and they are the proud parents of a daughter who is a physician assistant in Florida.